Czarina Elizabeata Romanova (insanedeity) wrote in closet_monsters,
Czarina Elizabeata Romanova
insanedeity
closet_monsters

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Intro which seeks input

Hi everyone,

I found this group cruising livejournal the other night, and it seemed like a place to get some outside perspective/feed back. 

I'm a 23 year old lesbian, just finally working my way out of the closet.  Things have gone well so far.  No surprises, no ugliness.  My friends have all been wonderful to me.  I am however about to have to tell my parents, as I am creating a theatre piece as a Senior Project to graduate college.  It is centered around the themes of denial, realization and coping.  Being gay is a huge component of that story. 

My father is the bulk of my financial support, still being in school.  I don't anticipate will take it too well of the bat, but I have had to gauge him in similar reactions.  He'll settle down to it.  The real impending crisis is with my mother.  I have live with her, and her home is where most of my close friends are located.  We have a difficult realationship at best.  She was raised in the 1950's and is very preoccupied with apperances, and what is proper.  I have spent a lot of time throwing that in her face.  Largely as it is an outdated way to think.  However, the real crux of this is that I am 97% sure my mother is a DEEPLY in denial lesbian herself.  I say this because we are exactly alike when it comes to our affectionate (not really the right term, but sexual is way too strong) behaviors.  And I am sure as hell not straight.  Everyone I have proposed this theory to, agrees with me on it.  I am really worried that she is going to go ballistic when I tell her about myself (I have no intention of telling her my suspicions about her)  She has in the past made my life very hostile and unpleasent and is capable of returning to that. 

Does anyone have thoughts?  any relevant experience?  ways to help diffuse this situation?  I've tried to be brief(ish) but thorough.  Ask any other questions if you feel the need.  Thank you for any input you may have. 

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